Returning to Kim's Gym: Don't Take the Bait

Returning to coaching with a totally new lens has made me analyze and process even the smallest moments.

I find myself reacting to situations, then later reflecting on why I made certain choices and getting curious about whether they worked…

Or not.

It’s easier to do this as a coach than as a parent—there’s less emotion involved.

But I’m realizing that every lesson I’m learning (or re-learning) in the gym applies at home, too.

Lesson 2:

Don’t Take the Bait

What do I mean?

Just because a child "misbehaves" doesn’t mean I have to respond.

Sometimes I must, but far more often, I actually have a choice.

Here’s what happened:

A 9-year-old boy in my group was feeling tired and silly, flopping around on the ground.

When it was his turn with me on the cheese mat, instead of letting me spot him, he flopped to the floor.

In that moment, I had two choices:

1. Argue with him and force him to cooperate so I could spot him.

   
   

2. Walk away.

I chose option 2, and here’s what that looked like:

I said, “It looks like you’re feeling super silly right now and don’t want me to spot you. I’m going to go spot on the other mat. If you change your mind, call for me and I’ll come back.”

That’s all I did.

That’s all I said.

He never called for me, and the situation diffused itself—

Without any rise in my anger

Without any rise in my energy

Without any rise in my blood pressure

I realize this is an advanced skill, and newer coaches might not feel confident letting a child miss a turn or choosing not to force them to follow instructions exactly.

But in my example, everyone wins:

I stayed regulated

Another child got extra attention

And the flopping boy got to flop—without a fight.

Every moment does not need a response.

What moments can you release and let the bait float right past ya?