Returning to Kim's Gym: Validate the Feeling

Man, these lessons just keep smacking me in the face.

And once again, I’m reminded:

The best moments in coaching almost never have anything to do with the sport.

Here’s what happened:

I’m working with a 10-year-old girl on beam.

She’s confident. Steady. Ready to try something new.

I ask her if she wants to do a handstand on the high beam — a skill she’s never tried before.

This was how our conversation went down:

Me: “Would you like to try a handstand?”

Her: (makes a face that says she’s excited, but nervous) “I do... but I’m scared.”

Me: “It’s okay to be scared. I’ll be right here spotting you the whole time. I promise I won’t let go.”

And then...

She did it!

And her face?

Absolutely beaming with pride.

Here’s the thing:

When a child tells you they’re scared, it’s not your job to fix the feeling.

It’s not your job to talk them out of it.

They already told you how they feel.

Believe them.

Validate the feeling.

Offer reassurance.

Be their steady ground.

This is the golden moment to build trust.

Here are a few phrases you can keep in your back pocket:

Pick one.

Try it.

With a child.

With a friend.

With a co-worker.

With your partner.

Big things happen when people feel seen.

Recent Posts